pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize