I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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