i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
