You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize