get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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