I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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