I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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