I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
We are two peas in an std pod
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
