yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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