just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize