I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
