i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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