Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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