careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
