i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
