I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Sext me about skeletons
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
