The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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