But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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