You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
