every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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