don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
