I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
