3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
