we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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