Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
