Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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