honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
