Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
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