we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
