the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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