I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
