Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I think my vagina is haunted
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
