I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
