sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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