...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
When are your genitals available?
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