Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Randomize