I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
