i just google imaged poop.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
