What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
