Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
