is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
