Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
