Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
