she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
