Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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