Well apparently he's into motor boating.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
