I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
