I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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