Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
