Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Randomize