Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
