Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
