last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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